Being a mother is probably the greatest gift, but the amount of attention needed in the early days can turn it into an incredibly exhausting period of life. Between feeding, changing, soothing, and attending your newborn on the constant basis, trying to get some time alone for yourself seems almost impossible. But, being a good mum implies caring about your own health and well-being as much as about that of your kid.

There are many obstacles for new moms on their way to self-care, but one of the hardest to overcome is your own guilty feelings towards spending some time on yourself. Actually, spending some time alone or with other people is far from being self-indulgence – it is necessary for getting rid of stress and exhaustion, and feeling energized enough to take care of your child later.

First thing to do before becoming a caring mother is to redefine for yourself what “having time for yourself” means. There is no need to go too far to find some time to rest. It may be as simple as drinking your favorite coffee, doing your nails, taking a long bath or a short walk during the day.

Planning ahead may also make some room for yourself. Although you can’t plan things out when you have a newborn baby, finding those small opportunities can still be beneficial. Instead of spending all your extra time doing housework, it might be nice to spend at least some of it just for yourself. Just 10-15 minutes of rest or activity may really refresh you.

Another great solution would be asking for help from your loved ones. Whether it’s your husband, relative, or friend, letting someone help you temporarily may provide some relaxation. This shouldn’t be seen as something bad, as it is normal for mothers who have newborns to need some extra help. Besides, this will make other people become closer to your child as well.

Sometimes, doing some relaxing things during your regular daily activities might be a good idea as well. For example, putting on some favorite music or a podcast when you are breastfeeding your baby or making an outing with a pram in fresh air may do the trick.

One of the other major factors would be the release from the notion of perfection. The fact of the matter is that many mothers feel pressured to keep up their homes, take care of their chores, and live up to some sort of standard. While these notions of perfection are quite idealistic and unrealistic, allowing yourself to give way to them could cause further stress. Taking time for you and prioritizing yourself will help you relax.

Forming a social network is another effective way to get through this period. Meeting other mums or communicating with them either offline or through social media could allow you to learn how to take better care of yourself and receive some advice on how to do so. Knowing that you are not alone will help relieve any guilt that you might experience when you take some time off.

It is worth mentioning that you must be flexible. Self-care in the first few weeks after birth will consist of small and minor actions, but with time, you will be able to fit in larger portions of exercise, social events, hobbies, and much more into your routine.

Rest should not be ignored as well. Lack of sleep is among the hardest challenges associated with being a parent, which can have an adverse effect on one’s physical and mental health. Even though it might be impossible to sleep for long hours at night, it is important to use the opportunity whenever the child is asleep, even by lying down.

Overall, creating opportunities to care about one’s own needs and desires in motherhood means being able to find a compromise between the desire to look after a newborn all the time and the need for personal care and relaxation. By accepting support and not feeling guilty about spending some time alone or relaxing while sleeping during the day, a new mum can successfully cope with her duties.

It is important to understand that caring for one’s own needs does not mean neglecting a baby’s requirements; it is one of the essential actions that parents need to take to ensure their child grows up happily and healthily.